Bales are yet another country qualifying for their first ever European Championships. The last time the Welsh took part in a major football tournament they came up against a Pele who could still get it up without a little blue pill and lost to his Brazil team through the maestro’s penetration up front.
Adidas have taken-up the challenge of kitting out Bales for their sojourn to France and have chosen a kit reflecting their status as a team that most of Europe thinks is a county in South West England. The lads with the three stripes have come up with a decent home shirt for the boyo’s, although the neckline appears to be one of those they put onto the shirts they make for women. Plunging lower than Aaron Ramsey’s IQ, it’s got that ‘Lads at Tiger Tiger’ vibe all over it. To be fair it probably has to be a wider neckline than most other nation’s shirts just to fit attacking-midfield Hobbit Johnny Williams’ cow-head through it.
Adidas claim the shirt’s plain, simple and somewhat bland design is ‘dynamically inspired by the vanilla, insipid and dull-as-dishwater personality of the world’s best forward-playing simian Gareth Bale’. It’s a red shirt without too much in the way of fannying about on it and for that the Welsh should be thankful. Adidas could have done similar to what they have with Northern Ireland’s home shirt and placed a white band around the chest to demonstrate Wales’ love of England and the English.
The away shirt highlights the dangers of letting designers eat Tangfastics. Over-indulgence on Haribo’s addictive little bastards can be the only reason* for the imposition of garish safety-green trimming on the collar and cuffs (*snigger*) that turn a potentially great shirt into one only a 10 year-old could love (*or drugs / stupidity / coal-mining safety).
Both kits feature three stripes down the sleeves rather than up the side of the body like many of Adidas’s new shirts. Nobody’s saying why.
JD Sports are the exclusive suppliers of Welsh Euro 2016 kits, training and leisure wear. Both Welsh kits along with a whole range of other Euro 2016 tackle are available here