This hot weather honks of festival season. Absolutely stinks of it, to be honest. In fact, it smells exactly like ruined trainers, 9:00 am cans of Magners & mild bouts of sunstroke. If all those glorious things don’t make you feel excited, then perhaps you should skip this post…
Festivals, in our view, are a transformative experience. An opportunity to put your body & mind through hell, with no guilty conscience. They’re events based purely around boosting dopamine, whatever that form takes, and should be celebrated as such. When else are you surrounded by your mates, music you’re into and acres and acres of green (gradually turning brown) space?
Festivals are about self-expression, and what better way is there to do that than through the clobber you decide to wear?
There are various genres of festival attire – bucket hats, tie dye tees, lads in luminous PE kits, and there’s even that lot that opt out of clothing completely. Each genre serves some kind of purpose, but in our view, a festival rigout has to be at least a little bit practical…
At its core, you’re going to want there to be some element of breathability – dancing around a field, even without chemical assistance, is sweaty. Secondly, you’re going to want to be prepared for the worst – expect mud & rain, and the disgusting sludgy combination of both. Finally, you need your clothes to let other people know what you’re about – it’s the perfect opportunity to wear the non-league football top that’s been cowering in your wardrobe for far, far too long.
Now, we’re not entirely sure if there’s any good festivals going on in Lincoln this year, but what we do know is there’s a good retailer to kit you out for one – EQVVS. So, although it might not be here quite yet, we’ve put together a list of attire from them that is bang-on for festival season…
Carhartt WIP Hartt Äôs Football Shirt
If, for whatever weird reason, you don’t already have a suitable football shirt for festival season, we’re putting forth this Carhartt one. Look at it, it’s very nice. The only downside is you might get mistaken as a City fan…
Gramicci Relaxed Fit G Shorts
There’s only one acceptable form of legwear at a festival. Shorts. Obviously. Nothing worse than getting mud and other blokes’ footprints all over the bottom of your trousers. Absolutely horrible. So for that reason, it’s shorts, and Gramicci make very nice pairs of them.
Salomon XT-6 GTX
Buying a pair of new trainers for a festival is wardrobe & wallet suicide. Unless you get very fortunate with the weather & people spilling drinks, your new shoes are going to be finished by the end of it all. If, for whatever reason, you do have to buy new trainers, though, give yourself the best chance and get a GORE-TEX pair, like these Salomons.
Lacoste Pique Bucket Hat
The quintessential festival item. The bucket hat. Not sure who decided bucket hats were a key part of the festival uniform, but we’ll give it to them; they work. This Lacoste one is very reminiscent of the early 2000s UK Garage, pirate radio thing. Insiiiiiiide.
Carhartt WIP Relaxed Hartt Football Shorts
Carhartt get it. Any football shorts worth their weight should have pockets, and nowhere are pocketed shorts more important than at a festival.
and Wander 2.5L Hiker Rain Jacket
Don’t be fooled by your weather apps’ infantry of sun emojis; weather at festivals can do a full one-eighty in a split second. Not sure if it’s got something to do with the spiritual power of hundreds of people shouting ‘nice one bruvva‘ simultaneously, but festival weather is not normal. So, you should bring a raincoat, like this nice and Wander one here.
Messy Weekend Sean Sunglasses
Whether you’re hiding your eyes from the sun or people’s unsettling gazes, sunglasses are a festival essential. Right up there with toilet roll and sun cream. These Messy Weekend ones look like they should do the job.
Carhartt WIP Small Essentials Bag
If you’re after a true insight into what somebody is like behind closed doors, ask to have a look through their bag at a festival. It’s a pretty solid representation of someone’s priorities, all held within a 30cm unit. Expect to find Gaviscon, rolling papers, three to five broken lighters, photos of loved ones & spare socks.
