1. The next time anyone tells you to go to Hell, you should book a flight to Trondheim Airport. It’s based just outside the town in a place called Hell. #DadFact
2. 7 out of 10 males in Amsterdam Airport are fully paid-up, bumbag wearing sex people.
3. 3 out of 10 males in Amsterdam Airport are from the North West of England and they giggle a dead lot.
4. When you’re expecting to camp outside in the Scandinavian wilderness, it’s best you bring more than a pair of Novesta.
5. Elk shit looks like rejected maltesers.
6. Blossoms are a phenomenon. I know we keep saying it, but they really are.
7. It’s impossible to eat a fig roll without affecting an operatic stance and calling out “FIIIIIG-A-ROLL”.
8. Klattermusen gear is as authentic as it gets. The fact it looks like a mixture of Norrona and Stone Island is even better.
9. Scandinavia smells like a massive garden centre. And mountain water tastes like nature.
10. The new Overlook Mugs are going to be popular.
