Michael has been doing a brilliant job covering all the team’s kits. Some of them are pretty smart and no doubt a fair few of them will be gracing 5-a-side pitches for years to come. Look at those Belgium and Spain away kits FFS.
Often just as smart/laughable are the suits or “teamwear” that some of the squads make a big fanfare of travelling to the tournament in.
Remember when England’s Marks & Sparks’ effort was launched to massive fanfare? If I could be arsed, I’d talk about how it was launched ridiculously early and pinpoint how some of the players ended up not getting to wear it in France due to not being selected.
Or maybe they all did. I don’t know. I can’t be bothered researching it.
Instead, here is a round-up of some of the best and worst team suits that have graced Euro 2016.
Italy
Might as well start with one of the best. Many of the other teams have gone for the old “Italian style” by pairing brown shoes with their lighter blue suits. Azzurri themselves went with an all dark-blue Dolce & Gabbana effort. Decent.
England
There they are, look, in case you couldn’t remember the suit launch that I mentioned in the intro. Which wouldn’t be surprising given how typical it is of the squad and how their tournament will go. It’s alright overall, improves the look of some players and is typically English. But it will ultimately be forgotten within the decade.
So many of them look like they’re involved in a wedding in Warrington.
Portugal
Similar to England but even more wedding in Warrington-y. If the England wedding was taking place at a country club 10 miles out of town, the Portuguese are heading to the registry office.
But why has Ronaldo stopped to pose for the squad photo only two steps down the airstairs?
Northern Ireland
The ultimate wedding party look goes to the Boys In Green though. Complete with daft ties and pocket squares, their suits were hired from Burton’s for the duration of the tournament.
A bit odd to make Oliver Norwood sit down whilst the other lads stand up, by the way. And whoever thought of holding an adidas Tango ball to stop it looking like a wedding catalogue shoot has failed miserably.
Belgium
Before the wedding there is, of course, The Stag. Complete with matching t-shirts and novelty haircuts. Kevin De Bruyne, there, can’t wait for the minibus picking them up as it has its own stripper on board. He’s just been sick before they’ve even boarded though.
#Lads
Czech Republic
A week after umpiring the tournament at Roland Garros, the Czechs must be based down on the riviera coastline. Three losses later, this lot will be partying on the yacht of an Alpine princess.
Romania
My favourite photo I think, so much going on.
Why are they so young? The lad at the back, on the left, was on the way to his first ever interview, realising that he needed some money over the summer holidays before starting college. He had a suit on which was very similar to the Romanian national football team and ended up getting a place in the squad.
The lad doing a selfie though; wow. Fantastic.
Croatia
All the trainees from Natwest head office can’t wait for the 2016 Coventry Conference. “Luka, did you get those lasses’ from Santander’s number or what? Where they heading later?”
Ireland
Whilst on their way to a team building event/sales conference for the EMEA business hub, the lads from Enterprise were buzzing to be on the same flight as Robbie Keane and Shay Given.
Wales
This division of Labour party delegates mean business. Everybody is toeing the party line and ready to spread the campaign message across the country (apart from yon-lad six from the back, on his phone). The time to march on Downing Street will come in the future but, for now at least, they are happy to focus on the upcoming referendum.
Together. Stronger.
Vote Remain.
Germany
Utter fucking shambles.
Spain
Hola-la, this one’s fantastic. We’re back to the good stuff now. I really like that tie. Automatically head to the quarters, lads.
And finally, Turkey
The picture that inspired this post. Best tie. Classiest suits. Bravest choice of shoes and (no)socks. High-end luggage. Overall look is absolutely spot on. Cool as.
Well done Turkey.
