In these times of austerity, justifying a three figure clothing purchase in our house is not easy. Many sacrifices have been made in the pursuit of something new, with some of my bestest bits being flogged on eBay as I sate my appetite for a new coat. But when I’ve run out of things to sell, the thirst for a treat doesn’t diminish and that’s where socks come in. They’re an affordable alternative to laying out brewsters on a jacket. I can afford socks.
To some, a pair of Salford Docks are something you buy in packs of three like underpants or you know, prophylactics. But to those of us sad fucks with slightly higher standards/OCD, there’s no point in showing off in a £400 coat if your socks are pure pov. That is, you’re a shit sock wearer.
With all that in mind and having recently had to sell three items to get two slightly better ones in return, I got to looking about the place for some new socks. And as I did it, I thought I’d do a post.
So here it is- my Spring/Summer Seasonal Sock Selection.
We’ll start with a bang… hey where you going? Come back, they’re not all like this. Ok so to some of you out there these just look like something that has been recovered from under the sink of a psychedelic artist. But to those of us who play it safe with greens, blues and blacks, these are an oasis of noise in a small enough dose to not make you think everyone reckons you’re weird. So swivel and leave me with my silly socks.
These have pure Peak District vibes as far as I’m concerned. They’re like something Action Man would wear to a Wicker Convention in Matlock. This is a good thing.
From Matlock to Manchester, the Oi Polloi lads know their socks with a large selection of Burlingtons and of course the Falke Invisible Socks . Trainer socks from Primark might be the affordable alternative but don’t tell anyone I said that. I’d never wear that sort of thing, obviously. These are the Rolls Royce of trainer socks.
Staying with Oi Polloi, check these out from Scando brand Happy Socks. They’re like something we’d have worn at school if we’d gone to a slightly relaxed school where showing off was in the curriculum. OKI-NI also have a decent selection of Happy Socks.
And a final offering from Oi Polloi is these Wigwams. Great name eh? I must have five or six pairs of these. I stick to the navy version which may seem like playing it safe but if I lose a sock, there’s no lonely one left over. They all go together. Losing socks happens far too much in our house. I don’t know where they go. Someone must be stealing them or maybe they’re being hidden from me to wind me up. All I know is it just MAKES ME VERY ANGRY.
Sorry, here’s a pic. The orange ones would go just nice with a suede mocc or a pair of Wallabees eh?
Rewind… let’s go back to those Falke efforts. Well until now they’ve cornered the luxury (aka “a bit dear”) trainer sock market with no competition but Burlington have typically dipped their toe in the water haven’t they? These are available from Stuarts London.
Also from Stuarts are the rather posh Pantherella. Remember when Rihanna sang a song about these? No, me neither.
Urban Outfitters have a pretty large selection of socks. From their Soul Socks 3 for a tenner invisible trainer socks through to the uber trendy camo socks or indeed similarly hip Mexican crew socks which are a bit navajo or aztec or some shit.
For my money though, their coolest offering are their Pantone socks. Get a load of these.
I could go on all day about socks, me. But I won’t because contrary to what you might think I do have better things to do. No I do, really. Stop laughing you.